How to Be an Ex-Footballer

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Talking about what we learn at school, the former Liverpool and Tottenham player said: “I don’t know why we’re not taught about mortgages or bank accounts, but we’re taught Pythagoras Theorem. I’ve never used that in my life, but I’d love to know these other things, life skills, if you know what I mean.” So walk with me into the dressing-room, to find out which players refuse to touch a football before a game, to discover why a load of millionaires never have any shower-gel, and to hear what Cristiano Ronaldo says when he looks at himself in the mirror. Similar to his previous two books, and in his typical comedic charm style, Peter provides anecdotes from his playing days to shed light on some of the characters he has encountered behind the scenes of some of English football’s biggest clubs. Peter Crouch’s 3rd book is another examination of the lives of football players presented in Crouch’s inimitable style. Crouch is an adequate TV pundit, no better or worse than some of his colleagues on BT Sports, but what he does have that some of the others don’t have is a sense of humour. You get the impression he doesn’t take himself too seriously. For that reason he is one of the more entertaining of the bunch. If you don’t agree with his assessment of the game he’ll still make you laugh. I'm not a big book reader, I'm just not. And I've skimmed through this already and thought 'I'm gonna really, really, really, really like this. Seriously, I'm really gonna like it -- Chris Moyles

How to Be an Ex-Footballer by Peter Crouch | Waterstones How to Be an Ex-Footballer by Peter Crouch | Waterstones

Just as there are books being written to be turned into screenplays, there are definitely books that are written to be listened to as opposed to read. Considering Crouch is a successful podcaster, it's not surprising that it is such clear audio book material. The source material is promising. How do you cope with life after one of the best jobs possible and the twin highs of competition and earning almost unfathomable amounts of money? Many footballers don't cope well at all, with almost 40% going bankrupt within five years of retirement. Time on their hands can also leave time for various addictions to creep in. Those facts are mentioned, but this book is more about the more entertaining things footballers have gone on to do, whether it's a career in art or releasing their own range of condoms.Peter goes in search of the answer to what his second career might be and encounters stories far more bizarre than anything you'll find on the pitch. From the pleasure and pain of management to the lessons we can learn from Jamie Carragher and Joe Cole on not going to seed. From those staying in the sport - the diehard veterans, coaches, managers, owners and of course the legion of pundits, to those moving on to pastures new. Peter talks to entrepreneurs, men of the cloth, eco warriors, artists, private detectives and budding actors, as well as those who've lost their way in addiction, crime and NFTs. Speaking about one ex-pro who changed paths, Peter recalled a trip to the cinema with his wife, Abbey Clancy. “We were watching the film The Theory of Everything. Amazing film, but I just wasn’t expecting a Chelsea centre-half to be in it! I was sitting with Abbey and it was a great film and then the doctor came in, and I said: ‘That’s Frank Leboeuf!’ And she said: ‘I don’t care.’ And I said, ‘No, seriously, that is definitely Frank Leboeuf!’ And she said, again, ‘I don’t care in the slightest.’

How to Be an Ex-Footballer By Peter Crouch | Used How to Be an Ex-Footballer By Peter Crouch | Used

man-children are thrown out into the real world, utterly defenceless apart from their multi-million-pound bank accounts.However overpaid and preening you might assume Premier League footballers to be, think again. They're worse, according to this amusing insider's account * Sunday Times Sports Book of the Year *